Season 3, Episode 19, "The Wheaton Recurrence"
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I'm not insane...
You were given powerful pain medication and a muscle relaxer, so, uh, don't operate heavy machinery.
Chicken Soup
The Penny-specific section of the new roommate agreement.
I'm not familiar with the acronym KMN.
Bernadette: I still think he looks like someone's pet.
I don't know which arctic expedition you were on, but I had a hoot and a half
Do you have the enchanted sword?
Mommy, I love you! Don't let spock take me to the future!
Hello, Hello Kitty! 
Sheldon tried to take the ring and I punched him.
I never eat in strange restaurants
Hypothetical Carnal Relationships
Siri, I'm crying.
Olive garden.
Exploded it with his mind